Clothes

I hate clothes. I really do. I hate trying them on. I hate trying to match things. I hate trying to be fashionable. I would love to wear pajama pants and a t-shirt all of the time.

The reason for all of this anger is that I went to buy a pair of jeans today. My butt has gotten so big that I can only fit into my "after baby" clothes. Now that's sad. I have been saying for months I wasn't going to buy anything new because I just needed to lose 10-15 pounds and I would fit into all of my regular clothes quite well. Well, I just got tired of wearing the same two things all of the time. I refuse to spend more than $35 on jeans, so I went to Wal-Mart, Target, Cato, Gordmans and finally Kohls. After trying on about 25 pair of jeans, I finally found some. They're cute, but BIG. I couldn't tell if they would fit me or Russ better.

I have come to the realization that my mirror sucks. It has been lying to me for years. I look in it and think, "I don't look that big". But then, when I go to a store and try something on in a dressing room, whoa doggy! I look so much bigger in those mirrors than I do at home. I don't even recognize myself. I look around to see who the big white lady is in my dressing room. Once I realize it's me, I calm down and try to squeeze into some jeans. Size 12. Nope- too small. This sucks. So I now officially own two pair of size 14 jeans. The other ones were my "after I have a baby" jeans. These are called my "I'm way too big" jeans. Oh, and I lost that weight from last week. I'm down to 165.

And what the heck is up with jeans now days? I truly haven't bought any in a few years. Everything is low rise. YUCK! On a skinny person, they look great. On a person with big hips and a big tummy, ew! I look like I have a muffin top. Everything squishes out above the jeans! And if I bent over... well, let's just say I'd make a great plumber.

So after trying on lots of low rise, wide legged, stright legged, boot cut, and long jeans. I think I found some.

I hate clothes. So I made myself feel better and bought some shoes too. Shoes don't make you look fat. I love shoes. They always fit, even if you're having a "fat day".

A Few Things

I've been busy over the last week...

My diet is not going as well as hoped. I had stopped eating sugar (just a few cheats) and had been running like crazy. I got on the scales Tuesday morning- I GAINED 4 pounds!!! FOUR! Is that even possible? Don't say it's muscle, because it's not. I haven't been lifting weights, only running. That just set me wrong for the rest of the week. So now I've had cookies and brownies this week. But I blame that on Russ. He is having a big thing at work this week and he was in charge of getting the food for it. So he has brought home Dara Marie's brownies and cookies the last two nights. If you have never had a Dara Marie brownie- you are missing out! They are the best ones ever! Plus, I haven't ran the last 3 days. I ran 1.5 miles on Monday, 1.75 miles on Tuesday, and walked 2 miles on Wed. (with Carla- yeah Carla!) I didn't go yesterday, because I worked at Maddie's school in the morning. I didn't go today because I had Jenny J., Jimmie R. and Laura M. from church over to practice songs for the ladies retreat. I'm getting back on Monday. Plus, on Tuesday I'm going back to my bench blast class that I love and on Thursday afternoon, Samantha (my favorite aerobics instructor) is teaching a boot camp type class. So I thought I would try it out since I can't workout on Thursday mornings. I'll let you know how sore I am on Friday!

We went to Disney on Ice: Princess Wishes last Sat. night. Russ (very willingly) gave up his ticket to Marli (Melinda's daughter). We all had so much fun. I finished this week a digital scrapbook for Marli and one for my girls of all of the Princesses. Here's a picture of the three girls and my favorite shot of Ariel. The picture of Cinderella was pretty good too, I thought. Maddie looked right at me and said, "she is waving to US!" I just hope Marli had a good time.

I have planned a scrapbook night at church on Oct. 26th. It will be from 6pm-midnight. It is a $5 donation to come and all money will go to the Susan G. Komen foundation in Melinda's name. I hope there will be lots of people there. We will have fun!

Our Race for a Cure team is growing. We are now up to 31 people and I'm sure that number will triple in the next few weeks. Thank you to those of you who have given money towards my goal of raising $125 for the Susan G. Komen breast cancer foundation. I appreciate your support!

I am also trying to help plan the Christmas program at church. I have a really great idea and all of the parts are swirling around in my head, I just need to sit down (with a few others) and get all of the parts together to make sense. I still have a few months, right?

What's for dinner?

I hate having to think about dinner. I dread it. If I plan things really well, and lay out a menu on a Sunday, I don't mind it so much for that week. But how often do I really do that? About 3 times a year.

I watched an episode of Rachel Ray last week. I had never really watched that before. She has a segment called "And that's what's for dinner tonight". I think that was it's name anyway. She did inside out burgers. I made them that night. They were great. (Look for the recipe below)
I love it when someone tells me what to fix for dinner. I just hate trying to come up with what to fix. It seems like it's the same old stuff: tacos, spaghetti, chicken something, hamburgers on the grill, or whatever is frozen- pizza, fish, chicken nuggets (see why I'm fat?)

So my question is to you all- What's for dinner tonight? Or at least, what is your favorite thing to fix for dinner? I like things that are quick and not a lot of ingredients.


Inside-out burgers
2 pounds ground turkey breast (99% fat free)
1/4 cup of mustard ( I used ketchup because I don't like mustard)
mix these two together really well- kind of like making a meatloaf

Make a small flat patty and then put in crumbled (cooked) turkey bacon and sharp cheddar cheese. Then put another small flat patty on top and squeeze the sides all together. Then fry it in a skillet. About 8-10 minutes on each side.

It is very yummy, and easy. We ate ours with a fork and knife because they were so big!

So far, not bad

So I haven't been perfect this week. But I've done so much better! I had not had any sugar until Wednesday when I gave blood. Russ set up a blood drive at his office in Melinda's name. So I went down and gave blood. Well, I went at 10:30 and I wasn't done until nearly noon. I was starving! And of course, they had all kinds of cookies, bagels and other sweets for you to eat after you donated blood. So I had a bagel that had cinnamon and sugar on it. That was oops number one.

Then last night, the girls wanted cinnamon toast, so I fixed that for a bedtime snack. That was oops two that was repeated this morning. Oops Three. But, I feel better and I have done well with running. I'm doing a mile and a half consistently. That's pretty good, if I do say so myself. I am taking today off, because I have sooooo much to do at home. So I'm going to make up for it tomorrow. But I am going to try to run 1.75 miles consistently next week. That's my goal anyway. We'll see how it goes!

Weight loss

We all hate being on a diet, right? Why does it seem like most of my adult life, I have been "watching what I eat"? The answer to that is because if I don't, I will turn into a blimp.

So in order to help me, I am going to start posting my weight.

Yes, you just read that right. A woman is actually going to tell people how much she weighs. You see, I just don't care. I have friends that are smaller than me, I have friends that are bigger than me. I don't care. They are still my friends, no matter how big (or small) their butt is.

Russ and I are counting points. OK, so I actually haven't "counted", but I'm watching what I eat. See, there's that darn sentence again. Mel encouraged me last night, so I am now off sugar. I am chewing a piece of sugar free gum right now, and it is the sweetest thing I've had all day. OK, so I've only had oatmeal and macaroni and cheese so far. I'm going to start eating more fruit and yogurt. Sounds like a plan, right? Well, I'm going to let you know when I eat something bad. I am going to be truthful. I will confess when I eat too much and when I "cheat". This blog will be my place to go for confession. I'm not Catholic, but it sounds like a great way to get stuff off your chest!

So here goes....

I weighed at the Y this morning (after running 1.5 miles!) I weigh 167 pounds. I can hear your gasps by the way. This is the largest I've been when not pregnant. (I was 172 when I was 9 mo pregnant with Maddie) I'm sad about this number, but motivated. I know I can lose weight, I did it last year at this time. I lost 20 pounds last fall. Just before Christmas, I weighed exactly 140. I was so excited because my ultimate goal was 135, and I was almost there. Then the holidays happened, a cruise, I threw my back out and got pregnant. So running, or even walking was hard for me. After I was 10 weeks along, I started feeling better, so started working out again. Then 2 weeks later, started bleeding. So I stopped all activity. Then one week later, lost the baby. So I have been a little depressed. I am not the type that goes out and runs my aggression out. I eat. I eat candy bars, brownies, cookies, pizza, and anything fried. So just about the time I was starting to feel better from all of this, and my body was starting to go back to it's pre-pregnancy size (I weighed 152 on May 2- the day I found out I was pregnant), my friend, Melinda got sick. Three weeks later, she died. When you have someone you care about pass away, you kind of forget about trying to stick to a diet and exercise. I once again, just wanted to eat to suppress my sadness.

I did start going back to the Y when school started. I have only been running so far. I haven't been back to my aerobics classes or back to the weight room. I'll get there, I know I will. Right now, I just want to run. I actually ran a mile and a half today- nonstop! I think of Melinda when I run. If she could bravely get through all of the pain she went through, then I can get through a little side cramp, right? My goal is to be running 3 miles at a time. That's how far it is for the Race for a Cure. I did it last year, and I so badly want to do it again this year. So I am trying.

I'll let you know how it all goes.

Iowa

8 days in Iowa + 2 days driving = too long.

After an 11 hour drive yesterday, we finally got home! I love being home. I love Iowa a lot, but am always so happy to come home and sleep in MY bed! I love my bed. You don't realize how big a King size bed is until you sleep on a full and a queen matress for a few days.

We had a wonderful time in Iowa. The weather was great. I have always loved Iowa in September. The temperature is perfect. Maddie and Becca love spending time with their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. Maddie always says she is going to live in Iowa someday.

Labor Day weekend was spent with my family in southern Iowa. My Aunt Marla, and her family all came in from Ohio. It was great fun to see them. We spent the night at Mom and Dad's Bed and Breakfast Cabin. Here is my shameless plug for their business: Click on this to find out more! Foxwood Bed & Breakfast

Mom and Dad took the girls back to their house. No kids! Awesome! It was just me and Russ, my brothers, Josh and Eric, my cousins, Andrea and Alicia, and Alicia's husband, Joe. So we played a hilarious game called "Dirty Minds". I laughed so stinkin' hard!

My dad took the kids fishing and drove them around in his 1931 Model A coupe. My cousin Tabby was there with her kids- Cade (just 3 weeks younger than Maddie) and Daelynne (3 1/2). (Look at the awesome playhouse in the background- was a shed that Dad converted for the girls. He even built a deck on it!)

Russ got to go golfing with his friend, Mark. He went to a really nice course in Des Moines. He said it was beautiful. He took the camera with him, and boy did he get a good picture.

This is a Momma deer with her babies. Beautiful, right? Until you notice what the Momma deer is doing.

Russ is such a good photographer, isn't he?

After seeing my family, we went to eastern Iowa, to see Russ'. The girls love being on Grandpa's farm. He has a golf cart he drives the girls around in. Maddie loves to drive it and often fights Grandpa for control of it.

I got to see my friend, Amy. We met when we were at the University of Iowa. After meeting her, I found out she was from Russ' home church. So we became fast friends. I hadn't seen her in quite a while, because now she has another kiddo! Amy, Addie and Finn met us at a park one evening so we could hang out and talk. Her oldest, Dylan, stayed home with Grandma. It was really nice to see her and her beautiful kids. (Becca is just 2 months younger than Addie.)

Russ got to go to the Iowa home-opening game on Saturday. He was so pumped! They won, which made it an even better game. I was a little jealous that I didn't get to go. I love Iowa football. When I was at U of I, I actually had season tickets! Now that's something most of you didn't know about me! :)

While Russ was watching a great game, Maddie, Becca, Grandma, Aunt June and I were having a tea party. Maddie set it all up for us and Grandma even got out a fancy "teapot". Maddie had a blast being the hostess. She even washed the dishes when we were done.

So all in all, great trip. I have a list about a mile long of things I need to get done today. I'm glad to be home, but hate the unpacking once you are home- oh, so much laundry to do!